Thursday, October 20, 2011

Project Thursday- A Different Project (Tara's Thursday)

At this point in my life, I do not have the time to start any new projects, even if they are an amazing idea. I just have too many other things going on in my life. So, the project idea that I had is taking a back burner. Instead, I am confiscating this day's meme and making it all about me (kind of like a second Monday. We all want more Mondays right? lol). I think I need an additional day each week to just blurb out whatever I feel like. Maybe I should just make the whole blog that way... Meh, maybe not.
Anyway, at this point, I am in cram mode for my upcoming court battle and I am mentally exhausted. There is just so much to do and so many not-so-positive memories to go through. While I am ok with where I am at now, that doesn't mean that I really WANT to go poking around through the muck you know?

To top it off, I had to get a psychiatric evaluation done as part of this whole thing. I was actually kind of excited about this as I felt that it would be a good opportunity to find out just how far I had come since my divorce. I got my report back today and I am not happy with it. For the most part, everything was about what I had expected, and in some cases, significantly better than I had hoped. However, the psychiatrist repeatedly left out some things, which leads the reader to misinterpret things slightly. That would be something that would be easily fixed by discussing with the reader (ie Judge).

The problem is that the psychiatrist's conclusions do not appear to be based on the testing as a whole, but rather one specific test, which, mind you, was done improperly. It is pretty much the only test who's results stated a particularly negative trait, which I struggled with many many years ago. The recommendation is that, due to this negative trait, I have a propensity to engage in abusive and improper behaviors and should seek therapy  to deal with my lack of control. Excuse me? Did you miss the part where I mentioned the fact that I had an issue with this nearly 15 years ago and have already seen a therapist about it? Apparently...

The rest of the recommendation is based off of single instances or statements that have been extrapolated to make it appear that they are significant issues in my life. For instance, I mention that, someday, I look forward to retiring and my kids moving away and being able to do things with just my husband. That was repeatedly stated throughout the report in a manner that insinuated that I am in a hurry for my kids to get out of the house. Totally NOT what I said!! Or that I said that my husband and I had some minor difficulties communicating with each other (mind you, we are both on our second marriage and our previous spouses handled conversations COMPLETELY differently than our current spouses, so we are having to learn new methods of communicating). This was twisted to say that I have anxiety about my difficulties with my husband and am having a difficult time with him.

The fact that my ex's report is full of things that I know are not true, and his conclusion is that he is just stressed about our current situation, is such crap. It leads me to believe that there is some buddy-buddy stuff happening here...

Overall, I am severely disappointed with this stupid evaluation. It just seems to solidify my ex's case against me, despite the fact that I have proof otherwise. Part of me wishes that I had the time and money to get a second opinion, but that isn't gonna happen before this goes to court. (sigh...) Let's just hope that my attorneys can do something with this. In the meantime, I've got to get back to it and get all of my evidence sorted through (I have so much on so many different topics, it's just a matter of whittling it down) and prepping for court. I feel like a little kid right before a shot, or ripping off a band aid. That pent up anticipation of something that you think is going to hurt, but you don't know and you think you know what will happen next, but you aren't sure. (Ugh.)

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Weighty Wednesday- What Just Happened?

I have had so many people I know come up and ask me what I am doing to get so thin and commenting on how great I look. As you may have noticed from the sporadic posts, the answer to that question is basically "Nothing."

I walk to and from the school several times a day, totalling near 3 miles, but that is the extent of my exercise. I eat pretty much whatever I feel like eating and NEVER skip dessert whenever it is offered (seriously, it's a disease). So, why on earth do people keep commenting that I look great?

After noticing that my favorite pair of jeans was constantly loose and the zipper was always falling down, I started to believe them and pulled out my box of clothes that has been hiding and gathering dust in the back of my closet (seriously, I forgot some of those clothes still existed it has been back there for so long) and guess what?? They FIT! I have a little muffin top in the front on a few pairs of jeans and my boobs are still bigger than ever before, but I am a size-freaking-SIX! What?!? (should I really be complaining?)

I have come to the conclusion that this is my blessing from Heavenly Father that my body bounces back after childbirth. It happened with Worf and Data as well, but since I was 30 pounds heavier with Geordi, I assumed that I would just go back to that. Not all the way back to "tiny."

Since my clothes magically fit (including my old high school Prom dresses. Nice huh?) I figured I should probably weigh in and find out where I am on my goals. So, here we are:

Waist: 27.5
Hips: 38.5
Weight: 132
Body Fat: 29%

Looks like I have lost 2.5 inches on my waist (only 1.5 left to go!), maintained my hips (2.5 inches left there), lost 8 lbs (12 lbs to goal weight!!) and dropped 3% fat. Since ideal is somewhere between 21 and 24%, I think I will shoot for losing another 5% (I like my curves) but will hold off at 29% because I am still nursing.

So yea! It's progress. I can't even imagine what I'd look like if I had kept up with the P90X routine for the last 5 months. I think I will still pick it up, but AFTER I done nursing Geordi. :)

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Tasty Tuesday- Grilling Fruit

I'm wondering if I should have labeled today Temper Tuesday... I have been really ornery today and I have no idea why (and no, it is not that time of the month...). It hasn't helped that it is the middle of vacation and Yar always tries to test (bad!) her boundaries when it is just the two of us for any period of time. For heaven's sake, I found out that she had wiped boogers all over her bedroom wall! Eww! (as we speak, she is currently scrubbing the porch to help "take care of our house")
Today hasn't been the best for breaking out the cookware and whipping up something amazing, but I couldn't leave the blog hanging AGAIN.

So, I'm breaking out my new found love: Grilled fruit

Why had I never thought to put fruit on the grill?!? It is simply amazing! Riker had a Bobby Flay cook book when we first got married (I think it may have been his ONLY cookbook) and it had a section dedicated solely for fruit. I always breezed past it to get to the meat and potato recipes for dinners.

However, one night I had some nectarines lying around and I wanted to make something sweet, but relatively healthy for the kiddos as a treat. On a whim, I pulled out the book (FYI, I really hate Bobby Flay, but he DOES have some decent recipes). In it, I found a recipe for grilled apricots with yogurt. I figured I would just switch out the fruit. The first time I made it, I didn't want to go through all the trouble of heating up the gigantic grill for 3 nectarines, so I pulled out the Foreman.

Grilling nectarines on the Foreman was a decent idea if you don't have any other option, but cleaning up was a nightmare (I have an older model that doesn't have removable plates). So, the next night, we were grilling hamburgers and I decided to try again. Boy was I surprised!!

The nectarines became nice and soft and had a subtle smoky flavor with a nice carmel from the charred sugar naturally found in fruit. I topped each half with a big dollop of vanilla Greek yogurt, a slight drizzle of orange blossom honey and a sprinkle of walnuts. Sooo yummy!

Luckily, the kids liked it! Now I am all about finding fruits to toss on the grill when Riker gets the urge to light something on fire :)

Try it out, I promise you won't be disappointed!

Monday, October 3, 2011

Miscellaneous Monday- I'm going crazy

I have had an absolutely CRAZY August and September and I am SO glad it is over. I have been dealing with a lot of court stuff regarding a custody dispute over Data and Worf. My ex husband tried to claim that I was mentally unstable and shouldn't see my kids anymore, despite the fact that they have lived with me since we got divorced. I had to go through a full-blown psychiatric evaluation (surprise surprise, I'm NOT crazy) and a custody evaluation to determine what would be in our children's best interest (another shocker: they should stay here). On top of that, Data broke his arm while on summer vacation with his father and wound up needing surgery to repair it once he got home.

You notice the nice bend in his forearm?? Yeah, that's NOT supposed to be there. That was after being set and casted for THREE WEEKS by the idiots that his father took him to... Not a happy Mama Bear >:( Then, we had our "normal" craziness of school starting and numerous birthday parites (4 birthdays in one month!!).

September didn't get any better with Riker working a ridiculous number of hours in order to pay for our attorney in the aforementioned court nastiness as well as the rest of our bills. Then, we decided it would be best for our family to move to another house (a whole mini-saga in itself). I am super excited about the new place and all of the promise it has, but it was a rough move. Just a mere week later, Riker's sister got married and wanted Yar to be the flower girl (which I had to make a dress for)

AND wanted me to make her cake (4 tiers of yummy, stress-filled goodness), so yeah... Oh, and then Worf got a bad ear infection the day before he was supposed to go to his father's and I had to deal with the headache that came with trying to convince the man that it wasn't really best for Worf to be going on vacation to 6000 feet from sea level with serious fluid built up in his ears... (common sense apparently isn't all that common)

Yeah... I think I'm doing pretty well to still have my wits about me at this point.

So, now I am taking the day off. I haven't done a single routine thing all day today, apart from heating up leftovers and giving Geordi a bath. I have been pretty laid back and read a book, played with playdough (fyi, real playdough is SO much more fun to play with than the cheapy stuff), and updated my blog. I probably should make something for dinner, but I have no desire to be productive. Especially sitting on my couch surrounded by boxes that need to be unpacked, a yard that needs cleaning and decorations that need to be put up. I really am excited about doing those things, just not today. It doesn't help that it is wonderfully overcast today and I have an even stronger desire to curl up with Riker, my fuzzy leopard blanket and a cup of cocoa and call it a day. Too bad it isn't cold enough for me to convince Riker to light up the fireplace...